Thursday, June 10, 2010

Things that make me want to punch someone in the neck!

Hello All! yes, it's been a while since I've posted anything... I've been working on another project and it seems to take all my creativity...

That said... What the HELL is happening in the world?

OK, so first... We are now nearly 2 months into the worst disaster in US History!

I can NOT believe that we can land probes on other planets... That we can clone animals... that we have MAPPED the entire human genome... but we just can't keep Lindsay Lohan from drinking!

Ok... I'm kidding... Unlike EVERY mainstream media outlet in the country... I couldn't care LESS about that skank! I mean, so what if she's a pill popping Alkie?!?!? Is that REALLY so odd in this day an age? Don't we all have at least one "Lindsay" in our lives? And what do we do to OUR "Lindsays"? We AVOID them, right?

If we are truly disgusted by the " Lindsay Spears Hiltons" of the world... we should all just pledge to ignore them! The really WOULD go away!

Ewww... can you imagine if there really were a "Lindsay Spears Hilton"? That bitch would be messsssssssssed uuuuuuup!

I may take a cue from Oprah and start asking all the guests on my show (also known as all the people who just come over to my house and sit around & watch TV) to sign a "No Skank Zone" pledge!

I MAY also have them sign a "No Oprah Zone" pledge... I mean, who the heck is she to have ME stop using my phone? It doesn't even APPLY to her.... When do you really think was the last time she drove herself anywhere? When was the last time she got finished with her show... hopped in her Hyundai Accent, that she's 2 months behind on.... whipped through McDonalds... where she paid with the change that was in her console? She's SO far out of touch! I mean... that's why she has to give away "Her Favorite Things" because none of the rest of us could AFFORD them!?!?! Favorite things.... Good Grief.... I'll TELL you some of MY favorite things.. Electricity, Water and Gas!

This brings me to my next topic... People who are too damn rich for their own good running for office for "my good".

REALLY??? you're serious??? This isn't some crazy reality show?

At last count, Meg Whitman... the former ceo of Ebay had spent more than 68 MILLION DOLLARS of her OWN MONEY for her "bid" for the California Governors Office!?!?!?!? 68 MILLION?!?!?!? I don't know what kind of world SHE lives in... but in MY world... if I had 68 million dollars... Fixing the government would be the LAST of my concerns!

It would have been cheaper for her to start her OWN state and just run THAT! Hell, she could have bought that island from Lost!

I keep thinking that maybe she's just confused? That maybe she thought she was bidding on the office, Like on Ebay? And she just put in some ridiculous amount, thinking SURELY someone else will out bid me!

I mean, People with that much money have NO CLUE about the types of issues that affect and concern me!

The last politician, and maybe the only one in my life that I've felt actually UNDERSTOOD America... and CARED about it, was Bill Clinton.

You can say whatever you want about what did on his "time off" but when he was on the job, None of us had time to be pissed off, because we all had jobs! We didn't freak out about the war in the gulf so much, because gas was 98 cents a gallon!!!!

Bill Clinton was like that friend that always shows up at the family cookout with a couple cases of beer.

But you know what... he always got the job done!

In fact, have you noticed that whenever there's a big ole mess going on... the first thing the president does is send Bill Clinton?

Think about it... Katrina, Haiti... and I'm willing to bet by the end of the week we'll him walking along a beach on the gulf.

Why is he so popular? Because he was the last president who was one of us. He knew what it was like to live on a tight budget with a single mom. He knew that you don't buy something until you're sure your check is gonna be there! And he knew that every decision he made didn't just affect how he would be remembered... but it would also affect each of our lives!

I mean, lets face it... I voted for Obama... but this has certainly been no picnic. I think we all know now that we should have gone with Hillary... If SHE were in office, BP would stand for "Bitch, please!" !!!