Sunday, May 29, 2011

Too young to croak: a tadpole's story

Happy Memorial Day weekend all!

Let me start by saying... I'm Back!!!

I took a break from the blog while we were working on a podcast, internet radio show... but I'm very happy to be back behind the keyboard!

Let me assure you, there have been months and months of strange happenings... odd events... and I have truly missed telling the world about them.

But SINCE it's the "official start to summer" I'm going to start with something timely... our pool.

Our pool is an above ground pool that is entirely surrounded by a deck... you know... to "class it up".

Last year, after a 10 hour HGTV marathon, Glen and I talked about tearing the deck, ripping out the pool and creating a Jamie Durie inspired "outdoor room"

Now, that decision was made as we peered out the window at our weathered pool with it's earth tone water.... as snow piled up on the deck.

We started pricing our supplies to build our outdoor oasis... and quickly learned that it would almost be cheaper for us to just enclose our back yard and attach it to the house!!!!


Have you PRICED deck materials since the world went "GREEN"? RIDICULOUS!!!!

I think we figured out that if we wanted to rebuild the deck we have NOW with that fancy shmancy "enviro wood" stuff... it would have cost us in excess of 20-thousand dollars!!!! FOR A DECK!!!!

CLEARLY we put that plan on hold... and as each day brought warmer and warmer temperatures... we caved... "Maybe we can just keep it ONE MORE year!?!?!"

Now THAT decision was made just about a month ago... and since we were planning on getting rid of it, we really didn't so ANYTHING to prepare it for the winter/spring months.

Ahhhhhh spring... with it's warm days... crisp nights... the beautiful songs of the tree frogs... OH LOOK! There's another frog!!! OH... and THERE TOO!!!! They're so lovely!!! Oh... there's a couple more... and THERE'S LIKE 5 OF THEM OVER THERE!!! GET IN THE HOUSE!!! GET IN THE HOUSE!!! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!!!!

And with that, the plague began.

Each night, our back yard/pool area became a hotspot for lurid tree frog activity!

I sort of likened it to "Spring" being "the 1970's" and our pool being "studio 51".

I KNEW what was happening out there... but like the 1970s New York City Police... I ignored it! I IGNORED IT!

So .. the day came that Glen and I had to go out there an just see what we were up against... This was maybe 3 weeks ago.

"WOW! Look at those cute little tadpoles!!! I see one... two...three, four, five... GLEN, THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!"

This was not an issue for Glen, he was ready to just pour bleach in there and kill them all... but I had JUST returned from listening to the Dalai Lama lecturing on living a peaceful life... so I was a bit torn. Plus... I mean... Tadpoles are cool, let's all agree on that.

As Glen is readying his forces... making a plan for the Tadpocalypse... I... Perhaps moved by the Dalai Lama's teachings... or the fact that it was May 21st, the alleged day of the end of the world... felt the need to SAVE as many as I could.

I found some old flower pots and filled them with water from that pool... and I fished out... probably THOUSANDS of tadpoles from that pool that would have meant certain doom.

As I was carrying that 4th flowerpot FULL of tadpoles to their new safe home UNDER the deck... I smelled something VILE! I did the usual sniff pattern... shirt, pits, hands.. I even checked my shoes... that's when I realized it was the WATER!

That water was WRITHING with TadPoop!!!!!! It's was TERRIBLE! And I was SAVING it so those horrible... ugly little frog bastards could LIVE?!?!?!

My good will was at a cross roads! Do I KEEP interacting with that water and become Arkansas' first cholera patient ever? Or do I stop the relocation process and be THANKFUL I saved... like 9 or 10 thousand of them?

As I gazed into the pea green depths of that pool and reflected on my options... I saw the tiniest little tadpole! He must have only recently hatched... As he swam with all his might up to the surface to gaze outward on the world that one day he would WALK in... I was touched.

I leaned down... peered closer to that little tadpole and as I reached toward him... to lift him to safety.... then... one of his older brothers or sisters swam up and BIT HIM!!!! REPEATEDLY!?!?!?!?!? I DIDN'T KNOW THEY WOULD DO THAT?!?!?!

Thankfully, after witnessing that attempted murder... I realized that it was time to CLEANSE the tadpole population.

Turns out... 5 bags of "Shock" cleansed it nicely!


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