Turtle Trauma

Over the past few weeks, little hobbling balls of reptilian flesh have been trekking across county roads and highways everywhere!

I have to admit, even as an adult it's hard for me to pass them without jumping out and grabbing them.

When we were kids, my Uncle Billy and Aunt Janet used to keep us supplied in turtles of all shapes and sizes.

We'd catch them, keep them for a day or two, write our initials on their backs in fingernail polish and then let them go, usually at Addie & Joe's farm... They were my great aunt and uncle.

But of all the turtle's I have briefly had in my life... there is one that permeates my memory more than any other.

I think it was summer, 1979.

Janet had recently gotten her special order, metallic ocean blue Camero Z-28.

She came out to Nanny and Papaw's to pick Chuck, Donishia and me up for a visit to our other grandparents, Abb & Alberta.

As we headed into town, we were halfway into the curve on east 80 near the old lumber yard when we saw that all too familiar bell shape inching across the highway.

Janet pointed it out and said she'd jump out and get it, which she did and then brought it back to Donishia and me who were sitting in the back seat.

At first... all was well. As you know, a frightened turtle will close itself up in it's shell until it feels safe.

We were probably a good 2 miles from Abb & Alberta's when the turtle felt comfortable enough to stick it's head out...

The instant I saw it's head... something shook in me. "I've never seen a turtle with orange and yellow on it's head... are his eyes RED?" I thought.

One by one, his little legs popped out... they were equally disturbing! "Look at those CLAWS!" I said.

About that time, the turtle decided he wasn't so keen on being in the floorboard... and he started crawling VIGOROUSLY toward my seat!

"Janet, this turtle looks funny... JANET!!! JAAAAAANNNNNEEEEET!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGHHHHH" I said as I pushed myself into that tiny space beneath the back glass of her car, which I had to share with my sister who was now screaming as violently as I was.

We were just a couple blocks from Abb & Alberta's by now so Janet chose to wait to stop until we got there.

The INSTANT she stopped and opened the door... My brother, Chuck, jumped out of the front seat... Donishia and I leaped out of the back, lunging from the seat straight out the door, never getting out feet within "biting" range of this demon turtle.

Janet grabbed the turtle, which had become startled itself and apparently released every drop of fluid inside it's entire body all over her new upholstery.

After that we NEVER brought a turtle in the car if we couldn't see it's face first!